An Honesty in Blue

a thing of beauty

passes between hearts

a known moment

intangible, unexplained

but explored

and given

as a piercing or a softness

alchemised

I dreamt of a man growing clouds from plant pots, I called one Love and the other War, I dreamt I fell from a fun ride and couldn't get back on, losing all my belongings forever, I dreamt jasmine was growing in my bedroom, a flowering at the end of my bed before a wide window

you and I sat together

it was enough

the kiss, our bodies

an honesty in blue

of night and stars and eclipse

of bright day

your face in the light

your beautiful face

I looked again at the first verse and knew I was struggling to say what my heart remembers, I remember a moment, I remember more, one uncaptured timeline, one which is a warmth in my chest, an opiated sensation in my body, a closing of my eyes to a serenity with a brightness behind

this poem could go on

and I would never be able to say what I want

for how can one explain a gloriousness that was once held in the hand

I did not ask 'Who are you?' for I chose to watch how you leaned towards me, how you smiled and the depth of your eyes. I chose to feel your skin next to mine, the trace of your hand, your lips. I chose to listen to your heart and then to your words and try to see what lay between. I wished for your presence as the Sun rises or the flower opens; gifts that come freely without bidding; something true to know.

And yet it seems that one never knows.

And the truth changes.

And the depth of one's eyes can be a cruel reflection.

I dreamt of a man growing clouds from plant pots, I called one Love and the other War.